How I Found My Calling as a Funeral Celebrant

I often get asked, “How did you end up doing this work? Isn’t it depressing?” To be honest, depressing is the last thing it is.

A Lifelong Interest in Death and Dying

From a very young age, I’ve always been fascinated by death and dying. It’s never held any fear for me; in fact, I believe the seed was sown early on. My curiosity has only grown over the years.

Since my teens, I’ve been on a spiritual path. I believe our bodies are just vessels. When we leave this planet, our souls continue to live on. This belief was confirmed for me by my husband, who passed away in 2023. But that’s a story for another time, which I’ll share in my upcoming book.

I don’t usually discuss my beliefs with families unless they specifically ask, which is quite rare. Just a few weeks ago, I had an unexpected conversation with a lovely 86-year-old man about aliens! I honour each family’s beliefs and religions, working with them in a way that reflects their values.

The Journey to Becoming a Celebrant

Before John, my husband, died in 2023, I had already decided to start my training as a funeral celebrant. However, when he fell ill, those plans had to be set aside. Instead, I became his primary carer for 13 months until he passed away peacefully at home.

John’s funeral was my first “official” ceremony, even though I hadn’t begun my training yet. It was an emotional experience, but it became the proudest day of my life. It was the final gift John gave me, and in turn, his funeral was my final gift to him.

After his passing, I completed my training and became a full-time celebrant. While I’m also trained in weddings, my heart lies with funerals. For some reason, weddings don’t resonate with me as much as funerals do.

Embracing the Role of a Soul Midwife

I’m proud to say that John had a very good death. This experience set me on another path: becoming a Soul Midwife. I help the dying and their families walk the same peaceful path I experienced.

I find immense satisfaction in helping families create their final gift to their loved ones. I truly love what I do.

The Joy of Crafting Unique Ceremonies

One of the things I adore about funerals is that they can be anything you want. They can be solemn, fun, or even a bit crazy. There are no rules! Your loved one can arrive on a motorbike and sidecar or even in a donkey-drawn cart. You can all get up and dance the funky chicken halfway through the service.

I relish the opportunity to craft a ceremony that genuinely reflects the person being honoured.

The Misconception of Depression in Funeral Work

Now, back to the question of whether this work is depressing. Most of us in the funeral industry—whether we’re Funeral Directors, Celebrants, or Crematorium staff—share a wonderful, respectful sense of humour. We all love what we do.

It’s a true vocation, one I wish I’d discovered earlier.

Finding Comfort in Grief

Grief is a complex emotion. It can feel overwhelming, but it’s also a testament to the love we have for those we’ve lost. I strive to create an environment where families can express their grief openly.

I encourage families to share stories, laugh, and even cry during the ceremonies. This emotional honesty is vital. It helps everyone to heal and remember their loved ones in a meaningful way.

Personal Touches Make All the Difference

In my experience, the most memorable funerals are those that incorporate personal touches. Whether it’s a favourite song, a cherished photo, or a unique theme, these elements help to celebrate the individuality of the person who has passed.

I work closely with families to ensure that every detail reflects their loved one’s personality and legacy. It’s about creating a space where memories can be shared and cherished.

The Importance of Community Support

During times of loss, community support is invaluable. I encourage families to lean on their friends and loved ones. Sharing the burden of grief can lighten the load.

I often remind families that they are not alone in their journey. There are resources available, including support groups and counselling services, that can provide comfort and guidance.

Conclusion: A Journey of Love and Healing

In conclusion, my journey as a funeral celebrant has been one of love and healing. I feel honoured to help families navigate their grief and celebrate the lives of their loved ones.

If you’re looking for a compassionate and personalised approach to honouring a life, I’m here to help. Together, we can create a ceremony that truly reflects the essence of your loved one.

Thank you for allowing me to share my story. I hope it brings a little warmth and understanding to your own journey.